Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Conversations with kids: Yours and Mine

Drew: "Mama, can I have my piece of candy now?" 
Mama: "Well, whose did you eat last night???" 
 Drew: "Yours."
Thanks Mom, Grandma and Hank for the Sees. Drew said it was delicious.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Famous last words

Alternately titled: "I can read the water."

 As promised in the previous blog, the story of what can go wrong when the wifey questions Jeremiah.

Not to embarrass my husband -I do love him after all- and I can't say for sure, since events did not unfold any other way, that it would not have gone as it did if in fact I didn't say anything and just let sleeping dogs lie. But the fact is, things went the way they went, I said what I said and his quote, "I can read the water" has gone down in history as one of those ones like, "You pulled a (insert name here)".

Generally, I am a cautious person. I HAVE KIDS! I am a mom and I don't like people getting hurt or spending money to repair broken things for idiotic mistakes. My husband, on the other hand, is generally a chance takin',  optimistic, thrill seekin', mud flinging, big engine, four wheel drive liking kinda guy. I don't blame him. If I were a man, I probably would too. But, I am not and therefore, when I see thrills, I see blood. When I see mud, I see a lot of cleaning work! When I see big engines and 4-wheel drive, I shake my head...especially if I see my husband BEHIND the wheel of said vehicle. I will say though that I trust his driving more than anyone else's. I know he knows how to drive in the mud an snow. He grew up with all that! Many years later and I think I am safe in saying I believe he used to take his brother's Honda out to go muddling in. If his brother didn't know that by now, my apologies to both my husband and him. It's water under the bridge right? How fitting I should say that given  the nature of this story.

That said, several years ago while we were still living in El Paso, Rachel couldn't have been much more than a year old, we had gotten a massive amount of rain. Jeremiah, being the thrill, mud, big engine and 4 wheel drive loving dude that he is, decides he's gonna take the family out for a drive in the F350. Everything is fantastic, it's a lovely Sunday afternoon, the desert smells fresh and clean. And then, he does it! He leaves the paved road. Now, let me tell you, our house backed up to a VERY large wash. They don't build hoses there for a reason! We were driving the road north towards New Mexico and he left the paved road...to go onto the sand...into the wash...the one that houses are forbade to be built in! The one with signs along the bridge warning of flash flooding! In doing so, I told him I didn't want to leave the road. If you are not familiar with deserts, especially deserts after the rain, chances for flash floods are extremely high! No mind, he tries to convince me it'll only be for just a little bit and everything will be fine. More famous last words.

Now, I don't consider either of us stupid people. I think we're fairly well in tune with the ways of the world. Anyone who knows me knows that I am fairly outspoken, honest and blunt. It's not as if I just let my husband walk all over me so I am sure you are wondering why I was not putting my foot down. Well, the thing is, sometimes I do tend to like to try and trust my husband's judgment. Sometimes it works out, other times, not so much. 

The river, that normally doesn't even have a visible trickle of water in it, is at least 10 foot wide and who only knows how deep. It doesn't look deep but as he's driving towards it I am thinking to myself, "Self, surely he's not going to cross that. No, he'll turn here pretty soon and we'll get up to the main road.". Meanwhile, he's not turning and we're still going directly towards the mini Mississippi. I think, "He must see that right? Because, we still haven't turned and there's no way he's considering crossing that!". Ahhh, well, wishful thinking! I didn't open my mouth until we were about 3 foot away from the ledge of that 'river' when I finally said, "You're not going to try and cross that are you?????". Jeremiah, ever so sweetly and confidentially said, " I can read the water. It's fine, we'll make it."

I told him-and I am pretty sure I was cursing at this point too- "There is NO WAY IN HELL you are going to make it, for one, and for two, there is NO WAY IN HELL, you are taking me and our baby across it in this vehicle. LET US OUT!". A little argument ensued, he insisted he can read the water and that everything will be fine. Finally, I said we are getting out and he can do what he wanted to do. I slid out, got Rachel out of her car seat and we stood there on the bank and watch the 'reading the water' unfold.

Have you ever, like, known something was going to happen, watched it happen in your head, witnessed it happen in real life, but then, couldn't believe what you just saw? Yeah, that's pretty much what happened.

I'll stop here and say that Jeremiah blames me! HE BLAMES ME for all of this. He said if I had just not said anything, if he had been allowed to gun it, not started the plunge from only 3 foot away, I wouldn't even be telling this story. Of course, I think differently because it's not like once we jumped out he couldn't have backed up and just forgot the whole crazy scheme  altogether or even backed up enough for more momentum. He said at that point he was committed because the front wheels were already sinking in the sand. You know, never mind that he could have backed up in 4 wheel drive or put something under the front tires, as I am sure there was piece of wood laying about. But nonetheless, the following happened: I am sure you've already guessed that he got stuck. And not only did he get stuck, he SUNK! Our F350's cab was now flooded with at least 5 inches of water and sand and turtle and rabbit crap!

Rachel and I watched from the shore and my husband had to 'Dukes and Hazard' it out of the window, up onto the hood and jump to the other bank. There have been a few times when I have felt like committing murder, very few, but this was one of them.

I don't think I said anything while he called our neighbor to come pick us up. I am pretty sire I didn't say anything the entire way home because I was so spitting mad my words may have turned into a bullet headed straight for somewhere. The neighbor's husband and Jeremiah took off on Jeremiah's Ford Ranger. That was his plan to try to get the truck out. I was speechless. I don't remember if I questioned him out loud- this plan to use the FORD RANGER to pull out a STUCK F350-but it was no surprise when they came back about 2 hours later, covered in mud & turtle & rabbit crap in the same vehicle they both left in...and no F350.

I mentioned that perhaps the neighbor down the road with a tow truck might be able to get it out. Ahhhh, now there's an idea! While they were gone with that neighbor I called my Mom who was visiting cousins. I am sure they just thought it was hysterical but I was still so spitting mad at that point. This plan for 'reading the water' sure turned out a lot differently than I am sure he envisioned it happening. He probably envisioned all three of us slip sliding, mud flinging, engine revving, 4 wheel drive engaging it through that silly old trickle straight to the other side. Yeah, he probably would have gotten some flack from me on the other side once safe and sound, but that was okay because it was a thrill!  Tthe best laid plans, right?

So, another couple hours later, a case of beer (as payment to the tow truck owner, not for their thirst, or maybe it was, I don't know), some very tense moments (because even the tow truck had a REAL hard time gettin' 'er out) later, and she was parked, sopping wet and disgusting, in the drive way.

That husband of mine, I am sure he can tell you what a great gal he's got. Because, there I was the next day, helping remove seats and flooring, shoveling sand and scrubbing turtle and rabbit crap out of it. To this day, I question his ability to 'read the water'. He knows that while he may catch some flack for not listening to his wife, she's gonna be there by his side instead of murdering him. Mind you, I am sure at that point I got my words in and as punishment and I don't let him forget what happens when he tries to 'read the water'. I like to think occasionally he really does heed my advice but still to this day he has not learned to stay the heck away from situations like that because last year he got the backhoe stuck in the pond twice and both times I pulled him out and he managed to get both vehicles stuck in the snow just to see what would happen if he could get out! A neighbor rescued him there with the tractor. Great job honey, you continue to read the water, I'll continue to love you despite.

Necessity= the mother of invention

Alternately titled: Honky Hook-up

Jeremiah and I thought surely the 'cherry picker' (engine hoist) would work fantastically to get the wood stove into the truck so we could deliver it to its new home in northern Kansas. Surely it would have if the kids hadn't bled off the fluid some time ago. Now the seals are probably bad and it 'bleeds' off every time it's jacked up so that wasn't going to be of any help. What's a person to do? Well, first you need hard headed ever so optimistic and unwilling to give up man, key Jeremiah, and his willing idiot wife, Amanda! You put those two heads together and usually it's an insane successful combination.

Ever wonder how ingenuity can come together to get the job done? Look no further! Let me just say though, this stove is a heavy son of a gun! I mean like, 400 lbs. heavy. I'd like to say 500 lbs. but that's probably pushing it. Honestly, I am a fairly strong person being able to lift 120 lb. alfalfa bales and move them around short distances and these small squares we deal with here in Kansas (55-70) lbs. make me feel like the Incredible Hulk! This stove...not so much! We tried lifting it, the correct way of course, straight from the ground. Yeeeeeah, not gonna happen! So, we think, okay maybe we can 'scaffold' it up. Seems logical right? As we were already late getting on the road, we didn't actually build scaffolding, we jerry rigged improvised and...well, I'll let you see the rest.

Photobucket
Exhibit A: 1' off the ground. Mind you, this was after about 6 lifts to scoot bricks to get it up on these logs in the first place!

Photobucket
Exhibit B: Notice optimistic man in background carrying bricks.

Photobucket
Exhibit C: almost ready for another set of logs all the way around!

Let me interject briefly to say that this is about the time Jeremiah mentions that perhaps we should remove the ash pan! I mean, REALLY? THE ASH PAN!?!?! He says, "Weight is weight". I roll my eyes. Meanwhile, there are probably over a dozen fire bricks in the dag'on thing that we didn't think to remove!!! But, don't forget the ash pan!!!


Photobucket
Exhibit D: Jeremiah: "All right, Honey, are you ready for the lift and shift?" Me: "Um no!"


Photobucket
Exhibit E: I am thinking, "Fabulous, NOW WHAT!?!?!"


Drum roll please....

Photobucket
TA DA!!!!!!


So, needless to say we got that heavy son of a gun in there but let me tell you, it didn't come without a massive load of adrenaline from me to get it to the bumper, some tears, a lot stress and I am sure maybe even some whining and complaining questioning our his sanity and the method. After all, anyone who knows Jeremiah, knows 'he can read the water' (I'll tell you about that story later). I saw this going very badly! Jeremiah said he was quite surprised though as there hadn't been as much carrying on on my part as he would guessed there would be before we started. Thanks a lot, Honey! Wouldn't you question when it took 4 grown men to get it up on the truck the 1st time!?!? Getting it off is the easy part, gravity helps there. It kinda hinders going the opposite way, as I am sure you can imagine.

At any rate, we did it. It wasn't nearly as bad after all. It did take about an hour though but it's delivered and I am relieved it got there in one piece! Nice little stove it is. 'Thomas' is still workin' away for now and we have plans to add a 'room to room' fan and see if that doesn't solve the bubble issue with the un-moveable heat  in the living room.

Drinking, shooting & albino squirrels

You're thinking, "Someone or something surely must have gotten hurt". Am I right? Or perhaps, "Now that's completely dangerous"? Well, you'd be completely wrong and surely nothing was harmed during the course of the weekend and I assure you, well no, I can almost assure you it was completely safe. I promise!

The drinking, well, I mean, if I said beer flowed from the Abair's pipes, would you believe me? No? Oh. Onward and upward then. Shooting: Jeremiah was able to locate some cheaper bullets for my Granddad's Winchester 71 we inherited. At $3+ a pop, they aren't real budget friendly when it comes to hobbies you know? I can't think of anything much more expensive if you're planning about an hours worth of 'fun'. Jeremiah has been itching to get out for a deer this year, fortunately for the deer, the freezer is full of milk. BWAAAAAHAHA. Jeremiah was hinting that I should make more soap. Tee hee. I do think that I can advertise milk for crafts and animal use here in Kansas so I'll have to look in to that as surely I cannot use all the milk in the freezer!! I was under the impression that advertisement was on your own property only regardless of what the use but I've been reading the entire law and I think it's legal to advertise for non-human consumption, we'll see.

Photobucket

The girls and I cooked and made goat's milk soap and had a wonderful time. We had a yummy goat's milk alfredo, rigatoni and home made pizza for dinner. Our soaps were honey & oatmeal and tangerine & rose hips. I brought the soap molds home, un-molded them last night and cut them all up this morning. Now they need to sit a while to cure.

Photobucket
James and the 'tactical turkey killer' which, incidentally has not killed any turkeys because, at least here in our neck of the woods, you need to sit on the back stoop and shoot them and not actually hunt them!

The boys installed a CB radio, did boy stuff and did some 'down range' lead poisoning. The kids exerted a lot of energy running and playing. As for the Albino squirrel, well, that was just a bizarre bonus. As Jeremiah, the kids and I were leaving yesterday, an albino squirrel crossed our path. Jeremiah tried to get a shot at it...a PHOTO shot for those of you who think he's nothing but a squirrel killer (and eater), but it ran off and all he got was the tire of a truck it ran under. Not very exciting.

Photobucket
Natalie with the .357.
Great weekend had by all! Lots of laughs, lots of stories and lots of fun!

Friday, November 4, 2011

Fleeting

Enjoying the last few fleeting days of warmth before closing up and calling it a day winter.

Photobucket
Ding Dong Dawn
I try to take the girls out to 'the woods' daily. They don't seem to want to go on their own this time of year. 'The woods' are in the NE corner of the property and pretty far out so I can't say I blame them. This time of year looks a little spooky in there. They will go out to the closer mulberry and cottonwood trees to see if any new leaves have fallen. As for grass, there isn't much in the way of that except this cool weather green stuff that's popped up in the last couple weeks. They also like to eat the ceder tree needles this time of year.

Photobucket

Winter's a comin' that's for sure but we have had quite a few very nice 'above average' (temperature wise) days recently. I remember last year, it seemed like Halloween day was the first real cool day and after that, it was all down hill. Two days ago we had a pretty good storm roll through that dropped quite a bit of rain. There wasn't much snow to speak of but it was there. I'd be happier with freezing rain as oppose to snow.

We're better prepared this year, live and learn right? The tarps we put up on the barn (See: 'Winterizing'e a few posts below), I think, are going to work out great! We've yet to get them up on each of the boy's buildings but that'll either be this weekend or next.

Photobucket

Jeremiah is off to St Louis Nov. 16th for a conference. Today he has the college instructor over to certify (in welding) some kids.

The living room is, for the most part complete except for a new front door that will come a bit later...you know, once we buy it and have time to install it =). I'd like to get the hallway walls, ceiling and trim painted before Thanksgiving, but I won't hope for too much. I do need to purchase those thermal curtains though for much of the house. I am even considering putting up a curtain rod over the back door (inside) and installing those thermal curtains for the winter. Man, when that cold wind blows, it just makes no difference if the door is shut tight or not. A curtain over the door may look a bit strange but hey, if it works I don't care!

So, I guess that's about all that's happening in our little world. About half of the does are bred. Kidding starts mid-March and I have every hope it will be decent weather next year! Everyone is looking fit and fine and I recently trimmed and wormed all 3 bucks all by myself. I'm quite proud of that fact. Jeremiah, I am sure, is quite happy as it's really not the most pleasant of jobs. Out of rut isn't such and issue, in rut you're 100% likely to smell vile and have things on your clothing you'd rather not think about.

 I don't know if I mentioned it or not but the 3 boys had all been in a pen together and that just wasn't working. A few of the does were all cycling together and that was just sending the boys into an absolute spastic state. Jeremiah and I rehabbed one of the north pens for them and things have calmed down considerably. The back fence of the north shelter was still that old field fencing. We took that down and installed cattle panels and a walk through gate for access to the new buck pasture that we sectioned off with high tensile electric last spring. The shelter itself also needed a little help that required a few boards to be installed but other than that, it's good to go and secure now.

Poor Storm is by himself but believe me, he's better off. Much of the time he can see the girls but he does get upset when the leave out to the pasture. Once I am sure all the girls are settled (bred), I may move all the boys back into the same pen and see how things go.






Halloween 2011

Photobucket
Halloween came and went. Rachel was a vampire and Drew was Captain America. I made Rachel's costume- a simple black dress with red insert in the skirt- on Saturday. The cape had spider webs on it. She refused to wear the vampire teeth so overall, she new what she was but if you asked a stranger it may have taken them a few guesses. She was happy and that's all that mattered.

Drew's costume ended up being the highlight of my week! I lost a bid on eBay for a Captain America costume because I was running errands. But I stopped at Target for blue pants and a blue hoody, sewed a white star on the front and an 'A' on the hood and he was happy as pig in a wallow! We picked up a white 5 gallon plastic bucket lid from the farm store and I sprayed it and used foam pieces to decorate the rest. Jeremiah pop-riveted a handle on and away we went. Drew refused to wear his normal black gym shoes but opted instead of black loafers. I guess he wanted to be a dressy Captain America, whatever. If he was happy, I was...happy.

Jeremiah was the scariest of all, a welding instructor. I know right?

I spent the afternoon with the kids at school doing crafts and handing out treats. That evening we went to the zoo here in Hutch. It's nice because there's a definite start and a define stop so no whining about not getting enough or wanting to go further and we get to see the animals too. It's not a big zoo but for their age, it's safe (no cars or questionable Reeses Peanut Butter Cups) and perfect really.


So anyway, there you have it.


Photobucket

Photobucket

Photobucket

Photobucket

Photobucket

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

For the birds

Can you imagine in your mind Barney Rubble trying to back pedal his human-powered vehicle? That's what I am trying to do with winter. How's it workin'? Not so hot. No pun intended. High of 48 tomorrow (which oddly, is the low tonight) and rain. Winter is for the birds.