One Potato Tick, Two Ticks, Three Ticks, Four

Rachel had a tick on her ear one time in California. Like, it had sunk in and all. I flipped out! Daddy to the rescue, pulls the thing out, we have a ceremonial burning (no, we really did burn it. They pop isn't that cool?) and that was about my experience with ticks. I HATE ticks, worse than I hate snakes.

I can't even tell you how many ticks we've seen since we got here. They are like friendly spiders now...only...they're ticks...and I still HATE them...and they aren't really friendly. So, in that case, I guess they are nothing like friendly little spiders.

Yes, I know, ticks carry all sorts of nasty diseases. I KNOW! But, you try explaining to these little buggers that we would prefer they stay outside and suck the blood of the wild creatures instead of our family pets and ourselves.

Yes, I also know they make spray to repel them. I KNOW! The spray smells and let me tell you that remembering to spray myself every time I go outside (or every time the children go outside) is like remembering the thing you keep forgetting. If you remembered, you wouldn't forget it! And I realize that if one of us were to come down with Lyme Disease that I probably wouldn't forget the spray. BUT, you haven't stopped eating raw cookie dough or brownie mix have you? No, I didn't think so. Not that you can get Lyme Disease from those things, but you understand what I am saying.

Anyway, so to date, I have lost count...lost count people, of the number of baby ticks I have pulled off of our beings. Not just like flicked off, oh no, PULLED off. Gross right? I KNOW!

Lordy, it's been, what, 2 weeks almost we've been in our new house and I have lost count? Sad right? I agree. I don't even remember who the first one was I pulled it off of. Drew I think. Rachel came running out to the back yard and this is how the conversation went...

Rachel: "Mama! Drew has a tick on his pier!"
Mama: "Um, where?"
Rachel: "His pier!"
Mama (comes running up to the house thinking surely his "pier" is a pretty scary place to have a tick so I had better hurry) "Okay, I'm coming."

And so it goes that Mama comes running in and sure enough Drew does have a tick on him and it's close to his "pier" and not on his "pier" and by "pier" they heard someone referring to a penis as a "peter" and mistook "peter" as "pier". I can only imagine who would have called a penis a peter to begin with because Jeremiah calls it a pecker but whatever, it's all the same thing in the end.

So, there Mama is with poor Drew, pants down around his ankles laying flat out on the couch calm as can be while Mama pries this tick from close to her poor son's "pier". GOD, of all the things to be doing on a Saturday! Some people paint, some go hiking, some go fishing. NOT ME, I pry ticks from my son's genital area! Though I suppose that those who participate in hiking on Saturday may consider prying ticks from their genital area a Sunday hobby, bwahahahaha.

I realize that some people think it's difficult to pry a tick off. It's not, at least not these. I don't know if it's because they are babies, or because they haven't been on long (and I know this because we examine each other nightly), or what the case is. I know I am getting the whole thing, I am not leaving the head in (Mother) so rest assure that we are safe from whatever leaving the head in can cause.

I have yet to find them on the goats and I am all but astonished that the dog has never had one here or in Ca. that I knew of. My only guess is that they prefer humans because we are less furry.

To say it's been a bad year for ticks is almost laughable. We've been here two weeks and this seems pretty bad! I realize there are things we can do to minimize bringing ticks in but you know what? I can't exactly lock the kids up in their bedrooms and never let them come out. I can't feed the goats from the house and the lawn needs to be mowed, trash taken out, oh, and someone needs to go to work; that's just the reality of it.

I just really can't envision myself pulling a tick out of anywhere near Drew's "pier" though when he's a few years older so hopefully we can come up with something before then.

P.S. I'm sure he'll love me for this story in a few years. Is nothing sacred?? Muahahahahahahaha